Monday, 29 April 2013

Diary of a nice Lagos guy

I kinda miss sex

Part 2 

Loved by many hated by few, you hold the power to process life yet many have died because of you.  Men have gone to war because of you; I remember how you destroyed the Johnson's family house down the road. Your desire set their home on fire; you bring heat and have made some of the most powerful individuals in the world bow at your feet.  Men want you, women want you but I need you.  Will you come to me today, or shall I wait by my window tomorrow, will you just say hello and release me from my pain and sorrow. I yearn for you from within my within, oh please come for me for it has been long, I kinda miss sex…..


a.       SEX- (Noun) the division of a male or female species
b.       SEX– (Verb) Short for sexual intercourse (Mummy&Daddy tins)

Love is the answer... but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions. Woody allen.



It seems like forever now…… the last time I had sex was a couple of days before valentine’s day, days before I had my heart reaped out by someone I once loved with all of my heart and might. I miss the feel and warmth of a woman, me and Tobi use to do it a lot when we started dating but as the years went by she sorta withdrew herself now that I think about it I guess the whole withdrawal thing was Kevin’s doing.  I’ve lost myself, made the likes of Bree Olson and Sasha Grey my favourite actresses not cause of their acting skills but they come in handy from time to time.  
Porn has its place in a young man’s life but it will never be the same as a good old kitty kat. I like kit kats…...


I feel like am under a lot of stress lately, Chidi says I should have sex that I have a lot of load in my head. He thinks sex can solve a lot of problems…
It’s been a while I did this, asking a girl out in Lagos isn’t easy besides I wasn’t ready for any serious commitment, you see I just recently placed the last piece to my hearts puzzle, it  took time but I managed to put my humpty dumpty back together again. I vowed to myself never to let go of my heart so easily again. My only option for a non-meaningful encounter with the opposite sex was to pay for it, not something am proud about but I was tired of pornicating.
I remember I use to drive pass this hotel somewhere in Ikeja on my way back from work, a lot of times I would see young girls dressed skimpy standing in front. Chidi told me he had been there once.
I parked my car a couple of streets from the hotel, as I walk towards the hotel I feel a bit nervous but excited at the same time, last time I paid for sex was when I was still in school like some 8 years ago but I wasn’t going to back out I came out for business and that was what I was hoping to get.
 I’m sitting in the bar few girls around and a couple of men who I presume came for the same thing I did. As I sip on my beer I try not to make eye contact with the girls I just smile and check them out, hoping to spot my specs. 30minutes went by and nothing most of the girls I had seen were either too short, too dark, too skinny, to yellow one even had tribal marks from her ear to her mouth. I’m feelings pressed and in need to pee.
This woman walks up to me I can swear she was in her early 60s, she smelt of bad perfume her face covered in the weirdest combination of colors known to man. A special form of art or just an act to cover up worn out parts…..  She stands in front of me and the words “hi have we fucked before” came out of her mouth her lips covered in yellow lipstick.  Am dazed and confused, 10 seconds behind time before I respond with a smile, she sits beside me and giggles. She told me she was kidding and introduces herself, her name was rosemary I told her my name and pondered within, a combination of two positive words which could stand for purity and beauty were the two attributes this old lady failed to poses.
She leaves me after a couple of minutes of boring conversation to look for another customer. I guess she had the impression that I was bad market. I decide to go and use the toilet; I walk through a corridor filled with ladies calling me, some blowing kisses and a couple of them got physical. I finally make it through the corridor, am out the back door to pee when I see this beauty I walk pass her and look for a few seconds our eyes meet at some point, she smiles and I look away feeling shy. I’m aroused and confused hard as iron which made peeing a bit of a discomfort, as I pee into the gutter I turn around to catch another glimpse of this sexy being our eyes meet again and she winks at me, I summoned some courage and wink back adding a smile.




100 thoughts in my head as I zipped up I made up my mind that I had to have this babe at all cost. I remember I had about 20k on me; I took some deep breaths then turned around and walked up to her.  She smiled again and I told her I wanted to have her, another smile comes up from her full luscious lips and she takes me to her room. As we enter the room she locks the door and looks me in the eyes and tells me she’s going to take good care of me, “baby I go do you well” were her exact words, I just wanted to eat her up, yellow skin, full pink lips with one of the best bodies ive seen.
I could not believe I was about to have sex with her. We sit on her bed; her dimples were so cute every time she smiled. She works her hand around my groin region as if she wanted to confirm the type of weapon I was concealing down south side. She then takes of her top and lies down, “come and play with me” she said, my heart pounded heavy within my chest as I beheld her bosoms. This was a rare fruit I was about to devour, chidi will say elders food, believed it was high time I sat at the table of men. I struggled for some seconds to get her bra off; she helped me out and threw it on a chair. I held them in my hands, yellow, soft and alert I starred at them vice versa, one squeeze and then another which was followed by a third. She moaned soft words and started working my belt to take my pants off. I get up to take my clothes off when there is a loud knock at the door I look at her and make some hand gestures asking if she was expecting someone she shakes her head and says no, she continues with taking my pants off when there is another knock this one louder than the previous one, am scared now. She gets off the bed and asks who is there “it’s the police” was the response from the other side of the door; I felt chills run down my spine.  It wasn’t hard anymore……

Am sitting in the danfo van with three other guys who had been in the hotel as well. Scared as hell, I beg the policeman in the driver’s seat I pleaded with him with tears rolling down my eyes, I couldn’t picture myself in jail for one second, I wouldn’t last not even for one minute, mahn. The man felt pity for me and assured me he will plead on my behalf and my release will be guaranteed. The man of the law kept to his word and in a matter of minutes I was in my car heading home, I made a friend in my time of need. That was the last time I did that, I turned to porn for solace.






Chapter 3
February 10 2012
Friday
Tobi didn’t look too happy after we did it, I guess I was too excited.  I feel if I can’t satisfy her she might leave me, got to do something bout this.

February 13 2012
Monday
I used the stuff chidi gave me, if it performs the magic he claims, tobi is going to get it tomorrow. Valentine’s Day sex to bad.  Lol

February 14 2012
Tuesday
Worse day of my life, I can’t hold back the tears. My heart is heavy. Tobi left me.



Chapter 4
November 12 2006
Sunday
 It’s been so long this is not how I thought uni will be. Shade keeps giving me mixed signals I think she just likes me as a friend; I might just be the one dulling though. Anyways I’m so horny have to do something about this soon.

March 26 2007
Monday
Paid for sex again, tot I wud feel relief but am stock with a guilty conscience. To make matters worse her breath really so efing bad, I know am messing up I’m 2 handsome to be involved in this kind of parols. I’m done with dis.


i kinda miss sex


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